A Book Review By Guest Blogger Southern Belle
If I could mail every new stepmom a care package, I would enclose a box of Kleenex for those first few difficult days, a new tube of pretty posy pink lip gloss to give her spirits a lift, some Dove chocolates (need I say more- it’s chocolate), and a copy of Stepcoupling, by Susan Wisdom, LPC and Jennifer Green. It’s that good.
I picked up Stepcouplingone afternoon and finished it the next. I could not read it fast enough. As I read, I was highlighting, and writing notes like “AMEN!!” and “Hmm…” and “Does my husband feel this way?” I felt validated, enlightened and grateful for the wealth of information I had been fortunate enough to find at my fingertips.
The book is broke into seven sections plus a bonus section of one couple’s look back.
Some well covered subjects were expectations, boundaries, roles, opposing styles and values.
How lovely it was to pick up a book for remarrieds that focuses not on the new family, not on the little darlings, but right at the heart- the stepcouple. The message is reinforced throughout the book again and again, that what matters most is the couple and to keep your focus on your marriage. Or as my Mama would say “Keep outsiders outside your marriage”.
For me, the chapter entitled “Embracing Values: Your Own and Your Partner’s” was the best.
“What threatens your relationship isn’t your positions on the priority line; it’s how you handle the gap between them.” Stepcoupling
Inspiring words, indeed. I have long read books on how we, as a remarried couple must agree on childrearing. To be given permission to think individually was a gift; to be given permission to disagree with love and success, priceless. You see, my husband and I dearly love our children and both share the same goal of raising them to their fullest potential and give them the best start to life we can. But our ways of getting to that goal sometimes differ, if not most times.
After reading Stepcoupling, I felt a new purpose in our already wonderful marriage – to stop focusing on those few areas that weren’t in perfect order, to remind myself daily just how blessed we are to have found this love we share, and to make sure I am nurturing the most important ingredient in our new family – our marriage, us, the stepcouple.
Every stepmom should have a copy of Stepcouplingin their tool box!
Leave a comment and you could win a free copy of StepCoupling! I will be selecting one lucky Stepmom on August 5th!