The Devastating News After My Divorce

This morning my very first article for The Huffington Post was published. I hope you will stop by and read it. Share it. Comment on it even!

broken heartI looked around the family room for things to break — a crystal vase, a porcelain figurine, a framed picture of my husband. He told me had been having an affair and it had been going on for nearly two years. After nineteen years of marriage, I knew I had to ditch the cheat. I married him when I was nineteen. He was all I knew and I had carefully crafted a life that looked perfect on the outside — two incomes, two kids, two cars, a dog, a cat, a comfortable life — and in the blink of an eye it all fell apart. I felt crushed, broken, and kicked to the curb as if I was yesterday’s garbage.

Read the full article

Celebrating 9 Years of cancer-FREEDOM

Today is my 9 year celebration of breast cancer-FREEDOM!! One left breast, 26 lymph nodes, chemotherapy, radiation therapy, and a year of being bald were a small price to pay. Love and hugs to my angels: mom, dad, my stepmom – Sharon, my daughters – Jessica & Christina, my brothers – David, Chris, Mike, & Ken, my sister Rebecca, Team Vermont, my friends – Danielle, Marcey, Jennifer, Colleen, & Sandy, Dana Farber Cancer Institute, yoga, and so many others who stood by me in 2004 (and continue to stand by me!)

me - after my head shaving party, 2004

me – after my head shaving party, 2004

And a huge shout out to God for sending me the love of my life AFTER my hair grew back!

Who’s Ready To Celebrate With Me?

Deconstructing The Perfection Monster

I’m learning, I mean REALLY learning, how perfectionism is the biggest mind game AND the greatest con on earth. If any of you follow my other blog, Serendipity Smiles, I’m sharing my journey as a brand new white belt in the gentle art of Brazilian Jui-Jitsu. And I have met the Perfection Monster. She is ugly, cunning, devious, and incredibly manipulative. The Perfection Monster is a negative nellie who is scared to try something new, scared of failing, scared of looking bad, and scared of messing up. She’s so scared of these things that she’ll do whatever it takes to keep you frozen in analysis paralysis, to keep you from your dreams, and to keep you in mediocrity. Ready to say buh-bye? I know I am!

perfection monster

For those of you taking our next eClass, be prepared to deconstruct your Perfection Monster!!

Registration has been re-opened, by request, until March 12, 2013.

Manifesting Change

Falling Up

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Do you sit on the sidelines waiting for the timing to be perfect? Do you wait for the planets to be in perfect alignment? Do you have a need to be perfect in everything you do no matter if you’ve never done it before? Are you afraid to fail?

In week 3 we are going to turn the myth and con of perfectionism on its head. In fact, we’re going to challenge each other to finally break up with perfect and embrace the concept of falling upward. Ready?

Registration closes on March 1, 2013!


Photo courtesy of Pop Watch

Why Would You Take a Stepmom Class?

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To be a better writer I take writing classes. To be a better yoga teacher, I take yoga classes. To be better at Muay Thai & Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu I show up at the dojo four times a week and practice. To be a better runner, I run. To be a better stepmom I sought help from veteran stepmoms. I scheduled private coaching. I learned think beyond my limited and unknowing thinking. That’s why I started my website and radio show. That’s why I teach other stepmoms how to carve out peace & harmony in the middle of chaos. Only six spots remain in our next eClass Manifest Change. I hope to see you in class!

Be The Change You Want to Be In YOUR Life

mind your mindBe the Change You Want to See in Your Life (and Family!)

In this 4 week online eCourse, we’re going to deep dive into the challenges, obstacles, and fears that keep us stuck in the confusing chaos inherent to step life. Manifesting Change is about you, focused on you, and to provide you with ideas and strategies to manifest positive and beneficial change in your step life.

When: March 18 – April 12

Where: Wherever you have internet connectivity. Your home, your office, the coffee shop!

Cost: $47.97

Early Bird Registration: Closed

Valentine’s Day Promotion: Enter promo code BEMINE at checkout and save 15%! This promotion is valid through 2/16/13 5PM EST

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Class size is limited to 15!Only a few spaces left!

Structure: Each week, I will send an email to the class with the framework and lesson for our discussions. Participation in group discussions is highly encouraged but not mandatory. Discussion times will be posted in each weekly email. A private Facebook group will be created to help facilitate group discussions. This group will be active when the class starts and until one week after it ends. Only class participants will be allowed in. Additionally, there will be four guest teachers who will provided a different perspective for each lesson!

About the Course

Week 1: Be Yourself, Be Yourself, Be Yourself
In week 1, we’re going to take a look at what stops us from being our true, authentic selves. We’re going to lift the veil of expectations, self-doubt, self-judgment, and look inside. We’ll also look at ways to discern the difference between the roles we play (wife, mother, stepmother, daughter, worker, etc) from our true authentic selves. We’ll brainstorm ways to push through the fear, make the changes that need to be made and get on with being who we really are.

Week 2: Martyrdom Looks Ugly On You
I do everything around here. I pick up their messes. I do all the laundry. I do all the cooking. No one does a damn thing to help! I’m sick and tired of taking care of his kids and cleaning up after him.

Does this sound like you? Martyrdom is a choice to be a victim rather than the victor. Durning this week, we’ll brainstorm ways to stop complaining, looking for sympathy, and singing the same sad tune to anyone who’ll listen. We’ll challenge each other to step out of the role of victim and into the role of victor. We will commit to being the driver of our life, not the passenger.

Eventbrite - Manifesting Change

Week 3: Perfectionism Is the Greatest Con On Earth
I know you want to do and be your best. Me, too. But there’s a difference in being your best and being perfect. In week 3, we’ll learn to let go of the need to be perfect, learn how to experiment, try new things, and practice, practice, practice. We’ll discuss how the fear of failure keeps us from trying and how we can quiet that rather loud and annoying negative nelly in our head.

Week 4: What We Think About We Bring About
You and I create our reality by the thoughts we think. Once we put that energy out there, the Universe can’t help but give us exactly what we put out there. The Universe wants to work with us, not against us! In week 4, we’re going to tap into the positive energy that we create when we shift our thoughts. We’ll discuss ways to reframe, let go of the negative mojo, and how to manifest the reality we truly desire.

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Whole Heart Step Parenting

life

Bright and early Monday (2/4) morning I’ll be on the radio with Blog Talk Radio host, Sandi Tuttle. I love Sandi and I know you will, too. I’m excited to be a guest on her show and talk about all things step life and what’s new and exciting at The Stepmom’s Toolbox. I hope you’ll join us…grab your coffee and turn up the volume as you get ready for work!

About the show

Call in number: (347) 843-4237

Listen via your computer, iPad, iPhone, or other internet connected device: Whole Heart Step Parenting with Peg Nolan

As a stepmother, I faced the same challenges and heartaches that millions of us face every day. And while there is no foolproof guideline for being a stepparent, there are ways to face the challenges without ending up with a broken heart!

Peggy Nolan is someone I wish I knew years ago. She is the force behind The Stepmoms Toolbox website, as well as the mother of two adult children, stepmother of four adult children, and grandmother of two.  Her Blog Talk Radio Show, articles and blog are all a gold mine of good sense, good humor and good advice for stepmoms (and stepdads) everywhere!

Join us for an hour of gently told war stories, plus invaluable tips from the woman who can help you keep your heart damage limited to a few hairline fractures, rather than broken into a million pieces!

See you on the radio!


PS – don’t forget to Register NOW for Manifesting Change – an eCourse for Stepmoms. Early bird registration ends at 11:59 PM EST on 2/4/13!